I Hope That Something Better Comes Along

"I Hope That Something Better Comes Along"
written by Kenny Ascher and Paul Williams

(Rowlf & Kermit--both voiced by Jim Henson--sing their laments about women after Miss Piggy just walked out on her date with Kermit)

Rowlf: Evenin' Rowlf. Rowlf the Dog. Sit yourself down.

Kermit: Kermit. Kermit the Frog.

Rowlf: Please to meet ya.(Rowlf plays a rapid musical scale across the piano's keys)

Rowlf: I'm no Heifetz, but I get by.

Kermit: That was...that was very nice.(Rowlf notices Kermit's sad mood)

Rowlf: Whoa, hey, broken heart, right?

Kermit: Does it show?

Rowlf: Listen, when you've been tickling the ivories as long as I have, you've seen a broken heart for every drop of rain, a shattered dream for every fallen star!

Kermit: Exactly. She just walked out on me.

Rowlf: Ah, typical. That's why I live alone.

Kermit: You do, huh?

Rowlf: (starts the song's intro) Yep. I finish work, go home, read a book, have a couple of beers, take myself for a walk and go to bed.

Kermit: Nice and simple.

Rowlf: Stay away from women. That's my motto.

Kermit: But I can't.

Rowlf: Neither can I. That's my trouble...

Rowlf:You can't live with 'em, you can't live without 'em.There's somethin' irresistabullish about 'em.We grin and bear it 'cause the nights are long.I hope that somethin' better comes along.
Kermit: (spoken): Yeah, I know what you mean...
Kermit:It's no good complainin' and pointless to holler.
Rowlf:If she's a beauty she'll get under your collar.
Kermit:She made a monkey out of old King Kong,
Both:I hope that somethin' better comes along.
Rowlf:Ah, but what could be better than a saucy Irish setterWhen puppy love comes on strong?Or a collie that's classy, a laddie needs a lassie,A lover and wife gives you a new leash on life.
Kermit: (spoken): Uh, Rowlf, was that a new 'leash' on life?
Rowlf: (spoken): Oh yeah...sorry about that.
Kermit:I don't mean to scare ya, my friend, but I betchaCome "Father's Day", the litter bug's gonna getcha;
Rowlf:The urge is righteous, but the face is wrong.
Both:I hope that somethin' better comes along.
Kermit:Still, it's fun when they're fetching,And agree to see an etchingThat you keep at your lily pad.There is no solution, it's part of evolution,
Rowlf:The pitter-patter of soles,The little feet of tadpoles!
Kermit: (spoken) Ah, Rowlf, tadpoles don't have feet!
Rowlf: (spoken) Oh. Sorry about that.... 2, 3, 4!
Kermit:There's no limitation to mixin' and matchin'
Rowlf:Some get an itchin' for a critter they've been scratchin'.A skunk was badgered the results were strong.
Both:I hope that somethin' better,I hope that somethin' better,I hope that somethin' better comes along!!!
Rowlf: Beep bop bidder da dum dum bum bum bum!
Rowlf: (spoken): It's not often you see a guy that green have the blues that bad!