"All These Things That I've Done" by The Killers

When there's nowhere else to run
Is there room for one more son
One more son
If you can hold on
If you can hold on, hold on
I wanna stand up, I wanna let go
You know, you know - no you don't, you don't
I wanna shine on in the hearts of men
I want a meaning from the back of my broken hand

Another head aches, another heart breaks
I am so much older than I can take
And my affection, well it comes and goes
I need direction to perfection, no no no no

Help me out
Yeah, you know you got to help me out
Yeah, oh don't you put me on the back burner
You know you got to help me out

And when there's nowhere else to run
Is there room for one more son
These changes ain't changing me
The cold-hearted boy I used to be

Yeah, you know you got to help me out
Yeah, oh don't you put me on the back burner
You know you got to help me out
You're gonna bring yourself down
Yeah, you're gonna bring yourself down
Yeah, you're gonna bring yourself down

I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
...

Yeah, you know you got to help me out
Yeah, oh don't you put me on the back burner
You know you got to help me out
You're gonna bring yourself down
You're gonna bring yourself down
Yeah, oh don't you put me on the back burner
Yeah, you're gonna bring yourself down

Over and out, last call for sin
While everyone's lost, the battle is won
With all these things that I've done
All these things that I've done
If you can hold on
If you can hold on

Review of CHALK

What follows is the copy of my rough draft for the DVD review of CHALK. It (or a version mostly like it) will appear in a couple of newspapers next week. Please let me know what you think.
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CHALK is a fake documentary that follows the school year of three teachers, with varying years of experience, and a first-year assistant principal at Harrison High School in Austin, Texas. The main characters are Mr. Stroope (Chris Mass) an overly confident third-year social studies teacher who is determined to be named “Teacher of the Year” before the year’s end; Coach Webb (Janelle Schremmer) a determined, passionate, and sometimes pushy second-year P.E. teacher and volleyball coach who fights against stereotypes and is determined to change things and people, but won’t change herself; Mrs. Reddell (Shannon Haragan) a former music teacher of five years who is now a new assistant principal after the former assistant principal was arrested and found guilty of criminal activities; and Mr. Lowrey (Troy Schremmer) a former business executive who left to corporate world to seek employment where he could make a difference in the world and is now a very anxious and nervous first-year history teacher.

CHALK is unlike any other film I have seen before about teaching. Most teaching movies revolve around one or a group of inspiring teachers who are shown changing the lives of their students, involves some hugely dramatic conflict, and wraps up nicely at the end with the teacher being acknowledged for the huge impact they have had upon their students. CHALK is not like that. The back of the DVD case describes being a “doc comedy style of THE OFFICE” but at a high school. That’s a fairly accurate description of style of the movie. However, it’s not very descriptive about what CHALK is really like. I’ve had some experience teaching in a high school and in my opinion the film, though fictional, gives a fairly decent overview of what teaching is really like: the few highs, the miserable lows, and the huge amount of frustration and inadequacy of each day. There’s a mixture of excitement and drama, comedy, lots of frustration, and just the right about of boredom and tedium. The film probably won’t inspire anyone to enter the profession, but it does provide a nice glimpse into the life of a high school teacher.

There are some discrepancies in the movie and between real teaching. For example, the classes seen in the movie are much too small than the typical high school classroom and there is no mention about testing and the impact that has and is having on changing the typical day in a high school. Still, the movie does a better job than any other teaching film about what teaching is really like. Mike Akel and Chris Mass are the “writers” of the film and Akel’s also is the director, and Mass is one of the stars as Mr. Stroope. Both of these men were former teachers themselves and I believe their experiences are what grounds the movie (mostly) in reality. The film was made for around $10,000 and much of the script was improvised around an outline provided by Akel and Mass. The result is exceptional and is a movie I think that everyone could benefit from watching, though not necessarily enjoying.

It should be noted that though all of the acting in the film is exceptional, there are some standout performances. The first is that of the students. The students in the movie are real life students, many who had either Mr. Akel’s or Mr. Mass as their teacher, and gave up most of their summer to not be paid so they could be in the movie. Their actions and dialogue are real and add to the grounded feeling of the film; they are just being themselves which is what much of the greatest acting ever performed really is. The other standout performance in the film is that of Troy Schemmer who performs Mr. Lowrey. Schemmer does an excellent job of capturing all the quirks and idiosyncrasies of a nervous, first-year teacher who is just trying to make a difference in the world and share a passion of his for those younger than he. Lowrey is the heart and soul of the movie and the story, though seemingly not intentionally, revolves around him. For example, the film opens with the statement that “50% of all teachers quit within the first three years,” and it ends with an ambiguous scene of Mr. Lowrey packing his things away for the summer, leaving the audience to guess for themselves if he returns or leaves and joins the ranks of the statistics.

CHALK is an “A” film that everyone should see at least once. Teachers will love it because it is so real and filmmakers should watch it because it illustrates that a huge budget isn’t necessary to make a great movie as long as there is a solid story and script.

Just an Idea or CHALK.

I haven't written much in the past several months. Things have been very busy for me. I've tried to jot some thoughts down from time to time to share, but things are so busy that I haven't even been keeping up very well writing in my own personal journal, let alone being able to write something worthwhile to express to the world about what's been happening, how I've been feeling, the things I've been struggling with and enjoying, etcetera. I still don't know if I'll ever be able to express in written form all that's been going on. However, this past weekend I saw a movie that does a really good job of summing many things up for me. It's called CHALK. It's a fake documentary about some high school teachers. It was filmed by two guys who used to be teachers. If you want to know some of what I've been living through, rent CHALK and pay special attention to Mr. Lowrey. That'll give you an idea and just maybe you can begin to understand.

LEATHERHEADS and the Celtics.

I saw the movie LEATHERHEADS. It was a good movie. It's a modern update of the screwball comedy. I love those types of films. I wish they would make more good old-fashioned screwball comedies like that more often. Films are dumbed down way too often anymore. I also wish everyone dressed more like people did in the 1920s-1940s. Even at the height of the Great Depression, people were generally much snappy dressers than they are nowadays.

In other news, let's hear it for my Celtics! They cinched homecourt advantage for the run of the playoffs today. I've been a Celtic fan most of my life (since I was about five). For the past fifteen to twenty years I've had to put up with name-calling and put-downs galore for standing by my team. I had to put up with all those years of people joining the Bulls bandwagon. But now, the boys are back in town. Take that, Chicago. Go, Celts!

A Book Review

It used to be that if someone wanted to keep educated with current events, a person would read THE NEW YORK TIMES. That paper used to be the paradigm of all the news that was “fit to print.” Unfortunately, THE N.Y. TIMES isn’t the paper that it used to be, has lost its objectivity, and has largely become a paper filled with little more than left-leaning political banter. Thank goodness for the NEW YORK POST! Started in 1801 by Alexander Hamilton the paper has gone through numerous shifts in ownership, but still exists not only as a newspaper, but also as one of the most amusing, interesting, and sensational papers in the country. I know that there are some that find the direction the Post has taken in recent years to be negative, but personally I find it refreshing compared to some of the more bland and completely uninformative writing in many large market newspapers.

HEADLESS BODY IN TOPLESS BAR is a collection of famous and infamous headlines taken directly from the Post. The book is divided into seven chapters: general news, politics, interior headlines, celebrities, sports, mafia, and international news. There is a preface to the book from the Copy Desk of Robert Walsh. There’s also an introduction that provides a short history of the newspaper and ends in a lambasting of former owner Abe Hirschfeld, who nearly drove the paper into the ground. Some of the Post’s headlines became newsworthy in and of themselves, such as the Thursday, March 24, 1983 headline that named President Reagan’s Strategic Defense Initiative “Star Wars”. Others are just amusing such as the cover story that gives the book its title, “Headless Body in Topless Bar.” The book is mostly composed of copies of front pages with an occasional background about some of the headlines.

I enjoyed reading through the book. My only complaint is that the NEW YORK POST is a newspaper over 200 years-old, but all of the covers are from 30-35 years, with most from the past 5-10 years.

Overall, HEADLESS BODY IN TOPLESS BAR is an entertaining book that fans of the POST and newsjunkies in particular will probably find amusing.

January 2008

Books Read
Inherit the Wind: A Hollywood History of the Scopes Trial by David N. Menton
*Superman the Man of Steel: Unforgiven Priest by MD Bright & Curt Shoultz
101 "Answers" for New Teachers and Their Mentors by Annette L. Breaux
Skeleton Crew by Stephen King

Movies Viewed for the First Time
Fido
Danielson: A Family Movie
The Bucket List
Cloverfield
There Will Be Blood
Sweeney Tod

*a graphic novel/extended comic book

I was only able to read through four books in January. The only one worth mentioning is Skeleton Crew. It's an older collection of Stephen King short stories and a few poems. King is a great American author. Most people know him as being a scary man who write scary stories. He write scary stories and Skeleton Crew has several of those. However, King can write just about any genre (except romance and chick-lit). It never surprises me how few people know that Stephen King is the guy responsible for the stories that became the movies Stand By Me, The Shawshank Redemption, and The Green Mile. Skeleton Crew has several excellent stories. However, if for no other reason check it out for "The Mist" and "Monkey's Paw".

As for movies, I didn't watch a lot of new films in January, but I enjoyed all six of the pictures. Fido was a movie that came out last summer that I wasn't able to see because I was at camp and it was only on limited release. Danielson is an excellent documentary that explores the difficulty of being a Christian and being an Artist; it also features the meteoric rise of one Sufjan Stevens. I really enjoyed Cloverfield. I know there are a lot of people that didn't and hate the ending, and even though I thought it was a bit of a cop-out, I still liked it and enjoyed the approach to telling the story. There Will Be Blood should win the Oscar for Best Picture (the Best Director should go to the Coen's for No Country for Old Men, but in my opinion There Will Be Blood is the better movie of the two). Sweeney Todd was alright, but I was a bit disappointed by the rather unclimatic ending.

Do You Believe?

Life can be very cruel. Life is full of pain and sorrow. Tribulations abound. It’s enough to make a person depressed and live in despair. As an Artist, it’s tempting to dwell on all the bad things and create solely from that. There is power in the darkness. But, that power is unsatisfying. The fruit it yields is magnificent, yet lacks the essence of wonder.

It’s tempting to submit to the darkness. I know. I’ve been there. Some things have recently just happened to me in my life that should have pushed me completely over the edge into the life of a complete cynic. But, something happened.

A long-held silence was broken and hope has been restored. Hope is such a wonderful thing. It’s one of the best things in the world.

I hadn’t completely lost hope in my life, but I had lost most hope. Things were so dark and confusing.

My life is still in chaos. My path is even more unclear than it was just a few days ago. There are things pressing in on me from every side. Yet, at least for the moment, none of that is bothering me. I have hope. The silence was not for naught. I believe that the impossible can happen again. Trials and tribulations will come. The world is a crazy place and life is full of injustices. Yet, love and hope remain. Do you, do you believe? I do.

The End of Silence.

For anyone who cares, the silence is broken.

A Perry Bible Fellowship

A Little Something On Barack Obama

I currently live in Illinois. Barack Obama is one of my Senators. Barack Obama seems like a nice guy. He's also a great orator. He's full of friendliness and charisma. He loves language and knows the power of language. There are a lot of people around my age who have joined the Obama campaign. They listen to him speak and believe in the words he says. They say that what Obama says makes them feel more hopeful about their lives and the world.

I want to like Barack Obama. I really do. Many of the speeches he has given to the larger general public are moving. I've felt some of the same things that my friends who support Obama do. Yet, there's just something about Obama that doesn't set right with me. I can't pinpoint it exactly. However, ever since I was forced to learn about who Obama was a few years ago when he first became one of my Senators, there was something about him that made me feel uneasy. Barack Obama reminds me a little too much of Willie Stark from All the King's Men.

For example, there’s been a lot of rumors that Obama is some kind of Manchurian Candidate of radical Muslim extremists. I don’t buy that particular conspiracy theory. In an attempt to lay these rumors to rest (and reach out to Christians), Obama gave an interview to Christianity Today magazine. In the interview Obama reiterates that he is a Christian. He also touches upon his views of abortion.

“Ultimately, women are in the best position to make a decision at the end of the day about these issues. With significant constraints. For example, I think we can legitimately say — the state can legitimately say — that we are prohibiting late-term abortions as long as there's an exception for the mother's health. Those provisions that I voted against typically didn't have those exceptions, which raises profound questions where you might have a mother at great risk. Those are issues that I don't think the government can unilaterally make a decision about. I think they need to be made in consultation with doctors, they have to be prayed upon, or people have to be consulting their conscience on it. I think we have to keep that decision-making with the person themselves.”

This is a great example of what a wonderful speaker Obama is. I am personally against abortion and believe that in most cases it is wrong, yet I can understand the rare case when a choice has to be made between saving a mother’s life and the life of her unborn child. It would seem that from his interview with Christianity Today that it is because of small nuanced possibilities like these that he seems to be “pro-abortion”.

Yet, on the anniversary of the Roe v. Wade decision this past week, Obama released the following statement: "Throughout my career, I've been a consistent and strong supporter of reproductive justice, and have consistently had a 100% pro-choice rating with Planned Parenthood and NARAL Pro-Choice America….But we also know that Roe v. Wade is about more than a woman's right to choose; it's about equality. It's about whether our daughters are going to have the same opportunities as our sons. And so to truly honor that decision, we need to update the social contract so that women can free themselves, and their children, from violent relationships; so that a mom can stay home with a sick child without getting a pink slip; so that she can go to work knowing that there's affordable, quality childcare for her children; and so that the American dream is within reach for every family in this country. This anniversary reminds us that it's not enough to protect the gains of the past – we have to build a future that's filled with hope and possibility for all Americans." This is only part of the official statement. I suggest you read the entire thing and read it carefully.

Though the statements that Obama made in Christianity Today don’t completely contradict his official Roe V. Wad anniversary statement, it is clear from the official statement that Obama believes that abortion isn’t something that should happen rarely, but is an inherent and inalienable right and something women should have upon demand, regardless of the circumstances.

The way these statements are worded illustrate part of the reason I don’t trust Obama. That’s not to say he’s not a likeable person or that he’s not a Christian. I think I would probably enjoy sitting down and having dinner with Barack Obama. However, I do think it should serve as a warning to those who have joined the Obama campaign because he’s “the man for change”. Change can be a good thing, but change just for the sake of change rarely is. Charismatic people can get others to go along with them just because of their personality and if a charismatic person, such as Obama, has learned the power of language, they can get people to do and believe just about whatever they want.

December 2007

Books Read
*Superman: Speeding Bullets By: J.M. DeMatteis & Eduardo Barreto
*The Feral Man of Steel By: Darren Vincenzo, Frank Fosco, Stan Woch
*The Gunslinger Born By: Peter David, Robin Furth, Jae Lee, & Richard Isanove
SparkNotes: Lord of the Flies
Angela and the Baby Jesus By: Frank McCourt
*The Trial of Colonel Sweeto By: Nicholas Gurewitch
I am Legend By: Richard Matheson
*Heroes: Volume One By: Various
**Romeo & Juliet By: William Shakespeare
Manga Romeo & Juliet By: Sonia Leong

*Denotes a graphic novel or book of comic strips.
**Denotes a work read before.

Movies Seen for the First Time
Enchanted
I am Legend
National Treasure: Book of Secrets
Daywatch
Lethal Weapon
Lethal Weapon 2
Lethal Weapon 3
Bridge to Terabithia

From the books I read last month, I'll only discuss two here: The Trial of Colonel Sweeto and I am Legend. The Trial of Colonel Sweeto is a collection of comic strips entitled "The Perry Bible Fellowship". Be forewarned, "The Perry Bible Fellowship" is crude, bizarre, irreverant, and wickedly funny. I am Legend is the book that has now spawned three movies (Last Man on Earth, Omega Man, I am Legend). I suggest that even if you haven't seen any of the movies but you enjoy psychological horror stories that you read I am Legend.

As for movies, we have Enchanted: one name Amy Adams. She's the type of woman I'd like to marry. Daywatch, it's the sequel to Nightwatch: it's not as good a story as Nightwatch but has some even more impressive visuals. Until last month, I had only seen Lethal Weapon 4. On Christmas Eve my brother and I sat down and watched all 4 of the films back-to-back. I can't believe I hadn't seen those movies before. They are probably the best buddy action flicks ever made.

The New Year

It's almost three weeks into the new year of 2008. For me, not much has changed in the past few months. I'm still teaching. I'm still struggling to find joy in the work I'm doing, but honestly by the end of most days I'm so wiped out that joy doesn't seem to exist. Our educational system is FUBAR.

I've gotten most of my tax returns. I've been teaching full time since the middle of October. Looking over the W-2s I have and keeping in mind the one or two I haven't received yet, I've figured out that last year I still didn't earn enough money to be earning above the poverty range. I realize that's relative because anyone in the U.S. is rich compared to most places in the world. But, I don't live in other places of the world.

I've been trying to do a little writing. It hasn't been much, but I am starting to brush up a short story I started last year.

I've still decided that I just want to do something creative for the rest of my life: write, act, make movies. I don't know how that's going to work out because I have a lot of debts I have to take care of, but in my heart-of-hearts I don't think I'll ever be happy in this life until I'm working at something creative.

I've been talking to God a lot. I still can't hear his voice. I've tried to look at this as a blessing. That maybe my Heavenly father has decided I'm mature enough to figure things out without constant prompting. I think about the story of Jonathan (in the Bible--I Samuel 14) and how he won a battle and conquered the Philistines without waiting for the ephod so that God could tell him what to do. I want to be like that. But, I am afraid. I've gotten used to listening to God. The only time in my life God was silent was ten years ago. It was one of the worst times of my life. God had to teach about love and the only way he could do that was to be silent. That silence lasted for six weeks. This silence has lasted for almost five months.

I'm making some efforts to change direction, but my efforts seem so meager. But maybe these meager efforts is all that I have to do. Even if it's not, I'd rather be doing something different, no matter how meager, rather than sitting around and doing nothing at all.

November 2007

Books Read:
Halloweenland By: Al Sarrantonio
Now and Forever By: Ray Bradbury
Split Screen By: Brent Hartinger
The Mist By: Stephen King
CliffsNotes on Chaucer's The Canterbury Tales By: James L. Roberts
The Psychology of Survivor Ed: Richard J. Gerring
*Superman: Kal By: Dave Gibbons & Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez

Movies Viewed For the First Time:
The Mist
The Running Man
Beowulf
No Country for Old Men

*Denotes a graphic novel.

November provided me a little more time to read because of Thanksgiving. I went through a wide variety of material. If you enjoy Ray Bradbury's writing, you might want to check out Now and Forever. It's a collection of two novellas that have appeared in various different forms over the past forty years. I'm a pretty big fan of Stephen King and am a huge fan of the directorial talents of Frank Darabont, so I had to read The Mist before watching it in theatres. More on that later. I'm also a big fan of Survivor and really enjoyed reading the collection of psychological essays about the show in The Psychology of Survivor. I picked up a few tips that might even come in handy on future auditions. Lastly, Superman: Kal is a graphic novel telling the story of Superman if it was set in the Middle Ages.

As for movies, I highly recommend The Mist and No Country for Old Men. Be forewarned, however, that both films are incredibly bleak. I was really excited about The Mist. It was adapted, directed, and co-produced by Frank Darabont, aka the guy who brought to screen The Shawshank Redemption and The Green Mile. Darabont made the movie on a budget of around $10 million, a feat unheard of in Hollywood. I was, however, diappointed a bit by the ending. Stephen King's original tale is very dark, but literally ends with hope. Darabont's adaptation does not and ends in nihilism. Other than that, it's a great film.

No Country for Old Men is the latest film from the Coen Brothers. I love the Coen Brothers. All of their movies are witty and quirky and highly entertaining. Sometimes they are even thought provoking. No Country for Old Men is an excellent film, full of subtlety and meaningful messages. At the same time, I was so depressed by the end of the movie I was on the verge of crying.

Cultural Deprivation and Depravation of Youth

Yesterday about 75% of the students at school were gone for the day on an "honors" trip. It's two days until exams and for most of the classes we watched the first part of THE MUPPETS CHRISTMAS CAROL. I thought it would be a nice way to spend the day, yet also have a connection to a famous piece of English literature. I didn't expect many students to know anything about Charles Dickens. However, I though many of the students would at least have known who the Muppets were. I was wrong. Almost all of the students I had in class had never heard of the Muppets. I thought the Muppets were a group of characters that were a part of American pop culture, like Charlie Brown and the Simpsons. The Muppets are a part of Americana, but most of the students I teach have never even heard of them. How depressing is that?

Enchanted

I saw the movie ENCHANTED yesterday. There are a lot of reasons to see the film. However, the best reason is Amy Adams.

Ah, Amy Adams.

Grammar Wanted

Last week I had something happen to me that I thought would never happen to me as an English teacher. I actually had one student say to me, "Why do we have to read these stories and do all these presentations? Can't we just do a bunch of grammar worksheets and stuff?" I almost fainted. I would never have believed I would ever have a student pleading with me to do more grammar work. Of course, if I give them the grammar stuff that the student requested, that same student will be complaining about all the boring worksheets and editing they will be doing.

The Silence of God

I found this posted on another blog that I frequently. It sums up much of what I've been feeling and struggling with lately, so I thought I would widen the audience some.

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It’s enough to drive a man crazy; it’ll break a man’s faith
It’s enough to make him wonder if he’s ever been sane
When he’s bleating for comfort from Thy staff and Thy rod
And the heaven’s only answer is the silence of God

It’ll shake a man’s timbers when he loses his heart
When he has to remember what broke him apart
This yoke may be easy, but this burden is not
When the crying fields are frozen by the silence of God

And if a man has got to listen to the voices of the mob
Who are reeling in the throes of all the happiness they’ve got
When they tell you all their troubles have been nailed up to that cross
Then what about the times when even followers get lost?
‘Cause we all get lost sometimes…

There’s a statue of Jesus on a monastery knoll
In the hills of Kentucky, all quiet and cold
And He’s kneeling in the garden, as silent as a stone
All His friends are sleeping and He’s weeping all alone

And the man of all sorrows, he never forgot
What sorrow is carried by the hearts that he bought
So when the questions dissolve into the silence of God
The aching may remain, but the breaking does not
The aching may remain, but the breaking does not
In the holy, lonesome echo of the silence of God”

- Andrew Peterson, “The Silence of God” on the album Love and Thunder

October 2007

Books Read
Love, Stargirl By: Jerry Spinelli
Amadeus By: Peter Shaffer

Movies Viewed For the First Time
Resident Evil: Extinction
Mirrormask
The Squid and the Whale
30 Days of Night

Due to the new teaching job, the play I was acting in, and a variety of other things (such as a couple of weddings), I didn't do hardly any reading or movie watching in October. Love, Stargirl is the sequel to Spinelli's highly-acclaimed and popular book Stargirl. That book remains as one of my favorite books of all time. Love, Stargirl not so much. In the introduction to the book, Spinelli attempts to justify why a sequel was written. Frankly, I think he should have let well-enough alone. Stargirl is an almost flawless novel and if it can ever shake the stigma of being classified as "young adult literature" could become something like a classic novel. I was excited and terrified when I learned about Love, Stargirl. I was excited because I love the characters from the original novel, but terrified because a sequel was unnecessary and might destroy what had been created. The book does do some damage, but it isn't terrible. If no one had ever read Stargirl they would probably really enjoy Love, Stargirl. After all, Spinelli is a top-notch writer and even his lackluster prose is better than most drivel one reads. Still, the book does take something away from the magic of Stargirl. Yet, I can't recommend one not read the book.

As for Amadeus, that's the play I was in and I always read the script ahead of time before the first rehearsal of any show.

As for movies, I'll only comment on two. First, there's The Squid and the Whale. It's a straight-forward , dramatic, coming-of-age story set in 1970s New York City. The writing is brilliant. There are some rather bizarre (some would say disgusting) incidents in the film, but none of it seems out of place. I wish I could make a movie as good as this one. If you love film, you'll probably like The Squid and the Whale, but if you're just a casual filmgoer, you probably won't.

Besides The Squid and the Whale the other film I enjoyed was 30 Days of Night. Sure it's based off a comic book and is a bloody, mind-candy film about vampires. But, lately I've found myself attracted to films about vampires, werewolves, zombies and the like. I'm not sure if it's because I know those movies are usually much cheaper to make than a typical film or maybe it has something to do with the idea of the half-existence those creatures have that interests me or if it's some other reason. What I do know is that I saw 30 Days of Night and liked it. Not recommended for the faint of heart.

Addendum.

Though nothing wicked this way has come, darkness has. Doom, doom, doom the bell tolls. No happiness for you.

But...

Then I remember something a wise man told me once: that as a Christian no matter how bad things get in life, it will always be better than Hell.

Later surprises from family and friends illuminate the darkness around me and at least for a few moments, I can see once again where I'm going.

?

Though nothing wicked this way has come, darkness has. Doom, doom, doom the bell tolls. No happiness for you.